Hi all.

I've moved. My new blog is

http://fangirl-khoo.livejournal.com

Cheers,

HS.

Never have i felt so disappointed with myself before. The tears just kept flowing non-stop since i came back.

Just what the fuck happened? Seriously what the fuck ?

I knew it right before Os that my grades wont be very fantastic, but today's results went below expectations.

The 2 years of O lvl journey had been very tough on me. Because i once used to be the kind of student who will do well in her studies. However these 2 years my results went downslope. I regretted, yes i did. Right till the moment before Os, I was trying to catch back whatever I've lost, but it failed apparently.

Yes i know, the grades are better than prelims, especially my sciences, but wtf happened to the rest ? And i've let so many people down.

I've let down my mum, who's always wanting me to go JC. Because now, I'm not eligible for any JCs. And i fucking get compared to my cousin who got 6 points. how wonderful eh.

I've let down the teachers, I'm very sorry to 2 teachers, seriously. I really really really wanted to hit the targets you all set for me, but /:

My O lvl cert is so fucking ugly, i hate myself. I'm gonna retake one subject because i ain't gonna let this grade stay with me for the rest of my life.

Yes, I know going to poly isn't a bad thing after all, but how would you feel if you cant even enter your desired course ? I am fucking upset.

Everything just came crashing down. The worst case scenario of L1R5 i've counted for myself just came true, the exact same number. I am such a great predicter eh ? Seriously, what am i gonna do now?

AND MY BIO RESULT IS A WTF JOKER SERIOUSLY.

And hey to you teacher : I know i haven't been doing well in my studies but i really wanna tell you that I've been trying and trying and yes i know up to now even up to Os, my results dont show, but pls dont give me that look alright ? Say if I'm sensitive or what, but i just felt like you were looking down on me.

Man, i knew today would come and i have no one to blame. This lesson was a painful one.

Well Jess, maybe it's fated that we stay together huh ? We did so badly that we could even just go to the same school together.

Blasting SNSD's emo music like Dear Mom, really helped to comfort the soul, though the lyrics werent meant for me.

And thanks yong for asking me to imagine fany giving me a hug and cheering me up. I did imagine and i felt a lot better. fany's eye smile make wonders. : )

Will not be updating this blog anymore but won't be closing down.

It really sucks to know that all of your friends can go JC and you can't.

Sorry to those ppl who called me and i kept rejecting/missing calls because i'm crying so badly i can't talk.

Hello hello, longgg time no post :D

Sigh i think 'O's is rather screwed up. Aye whatever, i know it's all my fault for not studying..... no point regretting now.

Anw, look what that Joker Joelle told me the other day ! :

ROFLLL, she funny seh. Last year when we were lab partners at the lab, i always talk to her about tangxinfengbao and jiahaoyueyuan thn she will say I'm crazy over it. Now look who's crazy over it ?! LOLLL. HEHE HK DRAMAS FTW \m/ rofl, she say she watch alrdy damn high LOL.

Oh, joelle and i regret so much for not going 金曲奖! Rawr, thanks huh, who say can wait till next yr de -.-

Thn when we were listening to the radio she got so high siaaaa LOLL worse than me. Only Joyce and I kept our composure HAHAH.

(9:13 PM) JOELLE  <33:	YESSSSSS! I SCREAMEDDD!
(9:14 PM) H:	eh what award they gave out le ? omfg you siaozhabor again, so scary, lucky never go with you
(9:14 PM) JOELLE  <33:	HAHAHHA! I DAMN HAPPY!!!! REALLYY!
(9:14 PM) JOELLE  <33:

ROFLLLLLLLLL.

The title of 'CrazyWoman' totally goes to her man. Scary sia, especially since exams coming to an end, she's become crazier ! O.O"

Lollllllll, hahahhaa anw many many many many plans with her and joycyy after Os, woooo cant wait [: hahha i do enjoy going crazy with you guys : D
 

P.S   Lala徐佳莹 创作才女 ROCK ON !   YOU GO GIRL ! :) CONGRATTTS SHI LUO SHA ZHOU !

oh congrats to joelle's boyfriend (mayday) for being the big winner of that night - 5 awards. congrats -.-

Ah, look at the time now. Haha. Just woke up(weird timing eh), gna continue studying after updating my blog. And there's tuition tmrw morning, i wonder how i'm gna survive ):

Ah, the big GCE 'O's in 2 days. It's either a DO IT or BREAK IT now. Somehow, i lost the feel of doing some subjects. Sigh i need to get hold of them back quickly.

Received Mr Toh's email. Thanks for giving me a sorta push right now, rather than breaking my confidence. Thanks for reaffirming my writing ability. Yeap, i hope Os can be like this. However, i need that luck. I really need that luck that I'll be able to write about a certain topic on that day, if not gonecase ;( How ridicule eh, 10 yrs of learning english, all determines on how you do for this paper. Ah, situational writing cannot make it la ): sad. Shall just go with the flow ~ Sian, can i make it? Mr Toh's hopes for me  = My hopes too. I'm like stuck in between. I really need that A2. Possible ? ._.

These few days(or rather past weeks) were really tormenting. It's like, i keep counting the possible L1R5 i can get ._. Yet, no matter how i count it, I can't seem to estimate what I'll get. Aye. shall just see what I'll be getting, won't be too good though. My parents are like forcing me to go JC like wtheck ? I don't see why poly = no future. Seriously. Sigh, but I'm alright about getting to whichever one. If my L1R5 > 15, poly it shall be.

Nothing is going right, seriously nothing is going right.

FML.

Graduating in a week's time. This sucks.

My whole life is so fucking screwed.

Junior College ?

Polytechnic ?

Study abroad ?

._.

我已经相信有些人我永远不必等
所以我明白在灯火栏珊处
为什么会哭

Awesome day today. Precious time spent with the teachers and friends.

Coming to think of it, this is probably the last event with the school for us Sec 4s in tms(well, other than grad night). Hmm ):

Yea, took many many photos today(Photos up on facebook!). Sorry if i looked like a desperate, grabbing ppl i see along the way to take photo with me. Because this is the last year in temasek, and i wna have more photos for memories.

Nevertheless, today was a great day spent !

Now, Prelims are soon gonna be over, next up will be 'O' Levels. I can't say I'm 100% confident for it, but I'll be working my way there. We are reaching the finishing line soon. Real soon. 2 months will soon be over.

Can't wait for the new life after secondary school.

有没有那麽一种永远 永远不改变
拥抱过的美丽都再也不破碎

有没有那麽一个世界永远不天黑
星星太阳万物都听我的指挥

有没有那麽一朵玫瑰永远不凋谢
永远骄傲和完美永远不妥协

有没有那麽一张书签停止那一天
最单纯的笑脸和最美那一年

有没有那麽一首诗篇找不到句点
青春永远定居在我们的岁月

有没有那麽一个明天重头过一遍
让我再次感受曾挥霍的昨天